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Does Your Husband Ever Do Something Drastic Without Telling You?

Lately my husband has been making decisions without my knowledge that he obviously can’t make for himself. It all started when I took my son to Madagascar Live and came home to a husband with a mohawk. Really, a mohawk? It turns out that he tried to give himself a haircut and ended up butchering it. He had to shave his head down to the scalp and decided to leave a mohawk just to “amuse me.” He of course can’t have hair like that for work, but he kept it as long as he could just to see me tortured.

It all started with that mohawk and a pattern has been going on ever since because every time I am away for no longer than a few hours, something goes awry. Again, only a few days ago, I took Colton on a play-date and came home to a fish tank in our basement. I’m not talking about a little goldfish bowl sitting on the counter, I’m talking about a tank that a three year old could take a bath in.  Now that is all fine and dandy, but we have a little 400 square foot basement with barely enough room for Colton to play AND I haven’t gotten to the good part yet…. he already has this:

So yes, right now we have this mammoth fish tank plus the other one he just put up. He for some reason can’t understand why I wouldn’t want another fish tank. Why on earth would a person need two huge fish tanks in our small space? I better win this battle or you might see us on an episode of Animal Hoarding.

6 Tips For Sibling Harmony

danielle1My boys are two years apart and while they are best friends 95 % of the time, the other 5% they nudge each other to the breaking point.   They have similar interests and like to play the same things.  There are some days that are better than others – and it also depends on what mood each one is in.  From the beginning I have always tried to explain to them that for the rest of their lives they have each other – they are family – be nice to each other… well as many of you can imagine that doesn’t always work.

 

Here are some other tips for promoting sibling harmony… I will definitely be implementing some of them around here.

 

  1. Allow siblings to express their feelings about each other.  Give your children time and space to vent their frustration.  When they talk – listen; acknowledge you understand his/her viewpoint.  Tell them this is something they can work out.
  2. Know when to step in.  When inevitable small arguments occur, it’s good to let your kids learn to work things out on their own. They are practicing negotiating skills for later in life.  If the argument becomes a fight, then intervene.  The more they are allowed to fight as children, the more likely they are to fight as adults.
  3. Make cooperation opportunities.  Once a month, plan a family event in which teams are formed, pair your kids together so they learn to cooperate to succeed.  The feeling of mutual accomplishment will bring them closer.
  4. Hold family meetings.  Routinely get your whole family together to address anything that’s come up.  You even can hold these meetings during family dinners.  Encourage your kids to bring up anything they would like to discuss.
  5. Don’t make comparisons.  It’s difficult not to compare your children, but to promote harmony, address the issue of the moment – the messy room, the backtalk, or the forgotten chores.  Keep each child’s strengths in mind and look for opportunities to point them out.
  6. Promote the meaning of family.  Periodically reiterate to your children the importance of family.  Show them the closeness of family by remaining close to your own siblings.  Remind them that friends may come and go, but family.

 

9 More Years

danielleRecently one night after the baby went to bed, my two sons and I snuggled up on the couch to watch a movie. While the boys got lost in Hancock – I looked down at my 9 year old and just couldn’t believe my eyes. Here was my little boy – now on a cusp of being a young adult. Where have all the years gone ??? First steps, first words, first day of school, first emergency room visit , first t-ball game and so much more….

My mind started to wander – and I gasped to myself thinking I really only have 9 more years with him – before he becomes an “adult”. I am hopeful that the next 9 years will go a little slower – so I can enjoy this person that Danny is becoming.

Instead of Thomas Trains he now recites baseball and football players, we have “real” conversations with “real” topics and questions (it is amazing what some third graders talk about). I love this new phase of our relationship but I am also sad he isn’t the small young boy so smitten with me.

Most days he tries to be so grown up – although he still has a little bit to go – as he tries to hide the small boy still inside. Recently one night I went to check on him before going to bed…Danny was sleeping with his lacrosse stick – but wedged under was his blue and orange stuffed frog he has always loved.

Someone had once told me “a mother’s day is long, but the years are short” – I couldn’t say it any better.